So since joining
Conscious Crafties I've met some amazing talented people. I've also started to sell a lot of my
Wristies so I thought I'd show you them. These are heat-able wrist warmers with optional scents made with real petals and flowers. I make them out of polar fleece so they are lovely and soft and hold their heat really well. They're great for arthritis, RSI, carpal tunnel, Raynaud's, EDS and fibromyalgia plus the occasional ache and pain. Now I've shown you these i'll tell you what they have to do with fatigue:
I'm making some today but fatigue is getting the best of me so all I've managed to do is pin them and make final cuts. Because fatigue will mean this post will take me all day to write I thought id write about fatigue.
Someone without chronic illness might think, or say: "what's the big deal? your just tired!" or "get some rest and you'll be fine!" That's the issue. no matter how long we sleep for we never feel refreshed, no matter how hard we rest fatigue will still hit us. After all we still have to eat, breathe, go to the loo, talk and try to have a life. All these things take precious energy when we have none.
Our bodies are fighting our illness' so we start the day with less energy than a normal person and use more doing everyday tasks.
So what does fatigue actually feel like?
It isn't just been tired, it feels like having the flu or the fatigue you might feel after running a marathon. It is a bone aching, hard to move, hard to think, fighting the urge to fall asleep, nauseating battle. Sometimes this battle starts because we've done something like gone to the supermarket or had a day out, sometimes it starts because yesterday you did the laundry. It doesn't always make sense.
Todays battle is because I put the clean clothes away in the wardrobe and cooked a meal. That simple. I didn't run a marathon, I haven't got the flu, I didn't do an aerobics class. I put clothes on hangers and made a risotto from frozen ready prepared veg. You see the problem?!
How do we cope with Fatigue?
Luckily I can still function with the fatigue I'm experiencing today (otherwise I wouldn't be writing this), but it means that all other plans are off the table. Everything I can do from bed will be done from bed. If I have to move I will be using my chair, you see the side effect of battling fatigue is if you fight too hard you still lose.
If I don't take the time to rest today and use as little energy as possible tomorrow will be worse. At my worst with Chronic fatigue / ME I was working and I pushed through the fatigue to turn up at work and try to keep my job. After a while things got so bad I collapsed after trying to get dressed. Just pulling some clothes on was too much. After that point it took me 6 months of careful pacing and sick leave to get to the point where I could do one thing that took a large amount of energy a day, for me that was driving a short distance or going to the local store for some food.
I had to learn what used up the most of my energy and limit that. I had to learn to take rest breaks without feeling guilty and lazy. Most of all I had to learn to listen to my body.
There's a great app called MECFS diary.
I used that to log how much energy I was using. After a week it gives you a functional ability percentage. That percentage shows you what your limits are. I also used this app to see when I should rest. For every 1 hour of high (red) energy activity I scheduled 30 Mins rest.
I used AYME's functional ability scale available
here (PDF) to work out my limits. I now flit between 60 - 70% instead of stuck at 20%.
How can you help someone with chronic fatigue/ME?
1. Don't get mad at them if their not able to do something
2. Don't blame them for their fatigue
3. Don't make them do things/ push themselves it wont help
4. Do Give them space to rest and pace themselves
5. Do try to help them by splitting activities into small chunks with time for rest in-between
6. Do support them when their overwhelmed, support is so important
7. Don't assume that if they did something yesterday they can do it again today ( we wish)
8. Do stay friends with them, they don't like having to cancel on you and they need your support
9. Make sure they have food and water within easy reach (we tend to neglect ourselves when fatigue sets in)
10. You've already done it by reading this post. Understanding how we feel helps you to empathise with us.
As always thanks for reading, I hope this can help in some way whether you experience chronic fatigue/ME or know someone who does. Feel free to leave any questions or comments below.
Laura:)